When I came back from my three-week vacation (and struggling yoga practice at home), I swore to myself that I would not aim to lose weight but instead made it my goal to be stronger, healthier, and happier. Nah, I am not rationalizing. I just don’t see the point of stressing myself out to meet my five-times-a-week practice and feeling bad when I couldn’t stick to it. My mentor once said that if being a vegetarian causes me stress for whatever reason, then I am missing the whole point. Same with my practice I believe.
Last Saturday was my first time to do a full practice in the studio. I was there at 8:30am–see, I am a reformed yogin! Ha ha! I used to be late for the Saturday classes 96.57 percent of the time =) It was difficult to start a discipline like yoga but it was even more difficult (and scary!) to get back to it. So I told myself that if I could not get myself into doing it that day, I would never get back to my regular practice. It’s now or never.
So I hit the mat and did what I was supposed to do…while keeping watch at my ego (or supposedly its absence) as I failed to do the poses I used to execute with relative ease. I guess the class was too early for my ego to be awake. And what I enjoyed the most was Connie and Avril‘s “team adjustment” (in school we have “team teaching”). That was the only time i wished there were mirrors in the studio so I could see my body and why I had to be “turned and twisted” in certain ways. Like when Connie said “when the shoulders are aligned in this position” in my head I went “ha? let me see! let me see! let me see my shoulders!” while in Marichy C, ha ha! Thank you so much, Connie and Avril! You are always welcome to adjust me 😉
To my surprise I was able to complete the series, with dropbacks at that (with YT’s instruction of course! Who me? Do my most dreaded part on my own?). I guess I have to trust myself more.
I left the studio sore but happy…just like the way I used to feel after every practice. But there came a point when I felt stressed out after class and that’s when I realized I was doing it wrong. Yeah, happy. I guess the strong and healthy part will come later, or sooner.